To Boldly Know – “That bush looked a little too sus.”

To Boldly Know is a new, light-hearted article series developed to give the SB118 community the chance to get to know the writers behind the characters. We all have different experiences with Star Trek, and no two people will have the exact same views. I want to use this series to give people the opportunity to share what they enjoy, their knowledge of Trek lore and their love of the movies and of the series. Hopefully, it helps to spark (friendly) debate in the community and gives people something new to think about.

For the follow-up to hearing from Lt. Commander Aine Sherlock, we now have a special pair joining us today. Everyone’s favourite real life British couple: Lt. Commander Lhandon Nilsen and Ensign Nera Ay.

Matthews: Thank you for joining us for the second installment of To Boldly Know. We’ll start with an easier opener and go alphabetically to avoid arguments. Right, out of every single piece of Star Trek content, who is your favourite Captain and why?

Ay: The best Captain of them all, Captain Kathryn Janeway! She’s just wonderful, isn’t she? Cares for the crew like they’re her children, will fire way too many photon torpedoes to defend them. And like me, she runs on coffee. Voyager was also the first series I watched from start to finish more than once, so it holds a special place for me as far as Star Trek goes.

Nilsen: I’ll have to go for Sisko. The kick-butt captain. I loved the vibe that he gave, and while I’m inspired by a younger Picard who was reckless for Lhandon’s character, Sisko is someone he’d very much want to be. I love how he was much more casual with his crew; he didn’t feel like he was this distant naval officer, but rather, he was a soldier in the trenches with you. He was someone you could go up to and ask for help, and you’ll get it, and if it says it’s all going to be fine, then you know, it will all be fine. 

I also want to add an honourable mention for Picard. I won’t go into details, but I’ll say that in the absence of a positive male figure in my life, both he and Sisko were my example.

And if I can be cheeky…Daddy Pike. I love Anson Mount so much. 

Matthews: OK, interesting choices. A follow-up to that, the Captain is given command of a ship. What canon characters would you select to make up the rest of the main crew? Don’t be afraid to mix things up with choices from several different shows!

Ay: There are so many good characters to choose from, this isn’t easy. Paris and Seven have to come along, obviously, and The Doctor. Need our grouchy medic! Tasha Yar deserved way more screen time. Dal’s personality would mesh well with Paris’. 

Kira and Una are great; they have to come along. And Murf!

There are numerous others I’d grab as well, honestly. But then we’d end up with a stupidly large main cast of characters. 

Looks like my dear other half has done a list, so list it is: 

CO: Janeway

XO: Una

Helm: Paris

Chief of Security/Tactical: Tasha Yar 

Chief Engineer: Tores 

Chief Science Officer:  Seven

Chief Medical Officer: EMH 

Bajoran Liaison: Kira 

General Security: Murph

Nilsen: Sisko would pick Ortegas for the Defiant, or that one helmsman who didn’t break a sweat when flying the Enterprise out of the Dyson sphere. Although he’d get on well with Chekov’s sarcasm.

I’d throw in Paris for good measure. I think he and Sisko would have a great arc. I think he’d have a laugh with T’Pau—they would warm to each other, I think. It would be interesting to see how Sisko and Riker would get on (with Thomas out of the picture). Both are very passionate about their work. Tasha would understand DS9 much more than Worf. At least for the early seasons.

Okay, okay… let me make a list.

CO: Sisko

XO: Kira

Operations Officer: O’Brien

Helm (can combine with OPS): Ortegas

Chief of Security: Tasha Yar

Chief Tactical Officer (can combine with Security): Worf on tactical, Tuvok on security

Chief Engineer: Torres

Chief Science Officer: Dax

Chief Medical Officer: EMH

Ship’s Counselor: Seven (it would be funny—she’d tell you what you needed)

Bonus: Edward Jellico. He may be hated, but his actions were sound and just, considering the circumstances. He was expecting war and preparing for it, but working his butt off to make sure it didn’t happen. If only he had learned how to communicate this, he could have gotten the crew on his side.

Matthews: The two of you are a couple in real life, so let’s introduce a bit of drama. What Star Trek character most reminds you of your partner, and why did you pick that character? We’ll go in rank order this time around.

Nilsen: Lwaxana Troi. Those who have met him will know. He was very good on our last outing; he didn’t start flirting with anyone. He’s very eloquent and loves the finer things in life. 

Ay: I want to argue against that, but it’s really quite accurate now I think about it. 

Hear me out with this one, but I’m going to say Neelix. Adorably clumsy at times, and spends a good portion of the day checking on the people important to him. And if they’re unhappy, he makes fixing it his priority.

See, I can say sweet things. 

Matthews: To another kind of drama, we’ve had sporadic updates on waste collection during your time in SB118. If you had to pick a Star Trek character, movie, and show to go in the bin, which would get sent to landfill and why?

Nilsen: Move Along Home… more like move along to the damned bin. Whatever that episode is called, I’m too disgusted to find out its name.

Movie: Into Darkness. I’m the biggest Kelvinverse fan. Star Trek Beyond was a shining example of what they could do, and it’s a shame we don’t have more like it. But if you’re going to remake Wrath of Khan, just remake Wrath of Khan shot for shot. I suppose the Vengeance is like a big Excelsior, so that’s nice.

Character: Alynna Nechayev. The actor Natalia Nogulich did the most wonderful job—this is just towards the character. She clearly had no idea what was going on on the ground when she visited DS9 and sparked Sisko to have a little rant.

How can the admiralty be so… dense?

Ay: Ooo. Tricky one. For show, I’m going to have to say Enterprise, for the simple reason that it’s the one I’m the least familiar with. For film….probably Voyage Home or Final Frontier. I just don’t really remember what happens in them at all. Character to delete? Keiko O’Brien. Sorry, she just annoys me. 

Matthews: Right, from something you would discard to something you enjoy. If you had to pick a Star Trek episode that makes you laugh, one that makes you think and one that makes you cry (or almost makes you cry); which three episodes would you pick and what’s the reason behind those choices?

Ay: I’ve realised that I’ve basically picked Voyager for all of this one. Oops. 

My cry and think is going to be the same episode. From Voyager season 2, Tuvix. This one fits both categories really well. It presents such an insane moral dilemma, with an equally dark ending. Always thought it was an excellent episode. For funny, Bride of Chaotica, season 5. Any of the Captain Proton and Chaotica scenes are hilarious, it’s good campy sci-fi, that we all love. This one in particular, because we get the debut of Queen Arachnia. Over the top bad flirting, two “villains” double crossing each other, it’s great.  Really wanted to find a way to work The Thaw (Voyager, Season 2) in – it’s wonderfully creepy and unnerving. The Clown is unhinged and maniacal, and right at the end, you almost feel sorry for him. Janeway was a little terrifying in that scene. 

Nilsen: Jon does not cry. Jon would never admit to crying. Who are you, and what are you doing on this Google Doc?

For laughing, any Lwaxana Troi episode is funny, but maybe Ménage à Troi for the casual flirting via Shakespeare.

For crying, I think it might be another Lwaxana Troi episode, The Forsaken (DS9). It’s so easy to just think that Lwaxana is a comedy character, but we really see her emotional depth here—how she grows to care for Odo, and how I think it’s the first time in the series we see more of Odo beyond the cold front he likes to present. When presented with this raw version of Odo, she doesn’t belittle or mock—she cares and respects him. More people should be like Lwaxana.

For thinking: Measure of a Man. I forgot how much of a cheese-infested gel pack Maddox was—not using pronouns, referring to Data as “it,” unable to see the man in the machine despite being shown by the whole crew that Data is one of them. Then there’s Data’s further discovery of himself—how he grows from blindly following orders to fighting for his right to live.

Picard undergoes an amazing arc. At first, he questions the orders, has a fun little shouting match with an admiral, and then folds—so he goes to persuade Data to go. But then, as he realizes he was wrong, he admits it and works tooth and nail to make up for his mistake and protect his crew member.

Special shout-out to Riker, too—he was put into the worst situation you can be in with someone you consider one of your closest friends. Data’s words to him at the end of the episode, where he doesn’t blame Riker but rather helps him see that he needed to play that role to help his friend.

And, of course, then there’s the implication of a whole race of “disposable people.” Turns out, Starfleet didn’t learn their lesson, and I point you towards the A500.

Bonus mention because I outrank everyone here, and I make the rules now. Read the standing orders. You have no authority here, Jackie Weaver.

Valiant (DS9). Just take a moment to look at what that episode presents. The best cadets in the academy are taken on a training cruise in a Defiant-class vessel and are so emboldened by their grooming in Red Squad that they go off on a path of destruction.

And none of them, when presented with an officer—in this case, Ensign Nog—submit themselves to his orders. In fact, they push him around.

This was a failure on two parts. First, Nog has to take some of the blame. He was trained as an officer, and even an ensign can give orders if the need arises. Nog, perhaps due to fear, anxiety, or a certain degree of hero worship, did not step up to do his duty.

Second, the biggest blame should be placed on the admiralty, who did not keep track of the ship that was—clears throat—FULL OF CADETS!!!!

Matthews: Some species in Star Trek get more screen time than others. If you could see any one species explored more on-screen, which would you like it to be? What do you find interesting about that species in particular?

Nilsen: I can’t say one of the three species we made in the past year on the OEB, can I? 

Ay: I really liked the Hirogen; the idea of this migratory species focused solely on the hunt and the honour they can derive from that was really interesting, and a little different from some of the other species we’ve seen. I’m a fan of the Alien and Predator films, so that might have a little something to do with it.  It would have been good to see what happened to them as time went on, and their contact with Starfleet became more regular. Also, as a slightly left-field mention, STO’s Lukari would be fun to see in a proper screen setting. Love their design, and how new they feel to galactic exploration and relations. 

Matthews: OK, I’ve heard that the two of you have a rather unique use for fruit bowls in your home. Tell us about that? What would each of your characters have in their respective fruit bowls?

Nilsen: As I sit down on my sofa in my living room, my gaze falls upon the expensive wood-and-metal coffee table with multiple storage compartments that stands before my television. In the middle of the coffee table, there is a fruit bowl, a centerpiece of the coffee table. Now, one would expect that the fruit bowl contains fruit, but alas, it does not—for I live with a hobbit.

Perched upon this fruit bowl (not in, but on top) is an assortment of letters, including a reminder from British Gas to send them our meter readings, an invitation to take part in a research project about high blood pressure, a notepad, a bit of junk mail, and then… when you take all of that off… what is inside the fruit bowl???

A set of coasters!!!!!

But maybe this is a fluke. Let’s now go to the kitchen. There is a fruit bowl on the table, and I gaze upon it. What do I see?

The remnants of a broken cereal bowl and a saucer that Jon said he was going to fix… FIVE YEARS AGO!!!!

We also see that there is a card game, a padlock, an authentication card for an officially licensed product from Chelsea Football Club (boo!), a 4G travel router from when I used to travel a lot more for work, a number of corks, and a bottle opener.…

No fruit!!!

Do you want to know where the fruit is???

It’s next to the bread!!!!

I have tried so many times over the years to empty these fruit bowls, but every time I do, Jon starts tidying and thinks that the sodding fruit bowl is a storage container.

Guess where Lhando’s fruit will live… IN THE FRUIT BOWL!!!! LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!!!!

Ay: Thank you for that answer, dear, it gave me a good laugh! The fruit bowls are very much a me thing, I’ve got a few of them around the house that serve as general storage areas for things that could be easily lost. Spare keys, locks, etc. Somewhere along the lines, this has extended to general tat I can’t find anywhere else for. Something I got from my parents, I do the same thing with vases, too. I’ve simmed Ay’s fruit bowls as it happens! Like me, he keeps random things in them, like his com badge and pips. 

Matthews: Final question. The two of you recently met a few of our other SB118 writers – John (Daniel McGillian), Matt (Daniel Herbet/Esa Kiax), and Meri (Alix Harford/Valora Croix); my question is have you both recovered from meeting the trio and has your doctor suggested seeking out a counsellor? That is a joke, of course. In all seriousness, what was it like meeting other writers, and do you think it is a benefit to the wider community that most people seem to get along and are willing to meet each other?

Nilsen: Shak… were you there? Were you watching us? I knew that bush looked a little too sus.

I got nagged at in person by Meri… I felt so honoured.

What was meant to be afternoon tea ended up with us not getting home until 1 a.m.

Ay: I avoid going to the doctor as much as I can. Hilarious, since I write one here. It was a great day, loved meeting some people from 118, and getting the chance to do things outside of Discord. Certainly a benefit that so many of us seem to get on, and are happy to meet up when the chance arises. 

Thanks for your time, Lieutenant Commander Lhandon Nilsen & Ensign Nera Ay!

You can read more about Lieutenant Commander Lhandon Nilsen and Ensign Nera Ay on the Wiki.