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Dear Kr’Abby: Coming of Age

Dear Kr’Abby,

May parents won’t let me leave the planet I live on.  All they do is nag me about how dangerous it is out there in the galaxy.  How do I get them to get off my back?
–Frustrated and Young

Dear Frustrated and Young,

The simple answer is: do your parents realize that it’s equally dangerous anywhere?  One cannot control chaos, it will strike whenever and wherever it pleases, even on the most pastoral of planets.  However, I imagine you have already pointed this out to your parents and have not gotten a positive response.  So let me address the two issues I see in this situation: the desire for freedom, and nagging.

You desire freedom, but have you thought it through?  Do you have employment available for you?  Shelter?  Friends or family who will support you in your travels?  A safe way to travel?  If you have not thought any of this through, your parents may be making valid points and you may need to put more time and effort into considering your adventures before you embark upon them.

Conversely, if you have put thought and effort into these issues and you are still being nagged, then nagging is a sign that your parents feel powerless and are trying to assert power over you.  It may be time for a discussion with them on why they feel the need to control your destiny.  They may have issues that they require counseling on.

Of course if you have prepared your trip well, talked to your parents and they still will not allow you your freedom, a great many adventures have come from a brave person who runs away from home.  Just make sure you have a job or family member waiting for you in the cosmos before you set off.

Dear Kr’Abby,

Girls think I smell bad, what should I do?
–Really not that smelly

Dear Really,

Well, do you smell bad?  That’s a loaded question as many species smell differently and many species have different olfactory senses to recognize good and bad smells.  So, please try this simple three step process:

  1. Are you fulfilling hygiene requirements for a young member of your species?  If not, do so!  Hygiene is not just for Vulcan scholars and teenage Terran girls, but for everyone!  If so, then go to step two.
  2. Is your species known for a pungent smell?  If not, please see a health professional and get a routine examination.  A foul smell can be a sign of a medical condition.  If not, continue to step three.
  3. If you are healthy and hygienic, tell the girls to kiss your targ.

Everyone will smell differently, and some people just need to learn to adapt to everything that living in a multi-species galaxy brings, including many new smells.

Dear Kr’Abby is written by Doctor B’Rusk, the Federation’s foremost half-Klingon psychologist who specializes in tough-love advice. We take submissions from across the galaxy!

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